Hello LFM Readers!
I just have a question for all of the post-natal Mommies out there: how do you feel about your body after you've given birth? Do you feel a sense of accomplishment? Like your body is a fantastically-designed warrior of some sort? Does the fact that you lived through such an experience amaze you? (My sister-in-law reminds me that women in other countries have babies out in fields every day!)
Though I have yet to go through it myself, I feel as though someone better be giving me an Olympic Gold Medal after I have this little girl. Yes, I'm opting for the ever-popular epidural in hopes of easing some pain, but I still understand giving birth is most likely going to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
That said, I'm fully prepared to accept whatever shape and form my body molds into afterwards. I'm wondering however, about a certain woman's frame of mind I saw yesterday at my local gym.
She came in with a baby sling on. Inside it, I could see a very little head peaking out and long skinny legs--no fat on him yet. He must have been "new to the world." I figured she must be bringing him to the playroom while she worked out; but why would she go through the trouble of putting him in the sling just to walk through the parking lot?
She checked in at the front desk, saying she wasn't planning on doing anything strenuous, she just "wants to lose her baby weight," and kept on walking to the back of the gym. The girl at the front desk and I looked at eachother in disbelief. Surely she wasn't going to work-out with a baby strapped to her, was she? The employee quickly picked up the phone and called a Manager to go and talk to the Mommy. No one under the age of 12 is allowed in the work-out area (insurance, yada yada yada), not to mention if the Mommy got hurt in some way and hurt the baby too.
I watched the Mommy leave after her confrontation with the Manager. Apparently he caught her on the floor doing crunches--all with a tiny 4-week old baby attached to her!! (I overheard him mention to the Mommy that she could leave the baby in the playroom; that's when she said just how old he was.)
I stood there shocked. Wow. Are you serious? Are you THAT crazy about your body that you can't even wait until the 6-week check-up point to start working out again? Though she wasn't super-defined, it's not like she was overweight by any means. She's not a trainer at the gym, nor is she a celebrity jumping back on schedule for a couture runway show. If she's that gung-ho about getting her pre-pregnancy body back, why not just take the baby for a walk, or try doing some yoga?
I just didn't, (and still don't) understand what the fascination is. With all of the body image pressure on young girls and women these days, shouldn't someone be easing their stress somehow? Especially after having a baby??? Look, I'm no Heidi Klum by any means. But what I have come to grips with, is that if I didn't look like her before, I'm most likely not going to look like her after. Why try?
My advice: slow down! Give your body a chance to recuperate after this most joyous occasion of having a baby. No one expects you to be super-model-ready just weeks afterwards, so you shouldn't either. People in your life understand what you're going through; there's no need to impress anyone. Take the time to bond with your child, as you will never get these precious moments back!
Until next time, put away your bikinis!
Karyn Potts
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2 comments:
Wow. That pretty much sums it all up! Wow. As a person who runs regularly and plans weekly workout time, there is a lot to be said for taking care of yourself. BUT there are DEFINITELY limitations! I hope that when I have a baby I'll be more concerned with his/her well-being than with fitting into my old jeans. Mingling with an ab-roller and Elliptical is no way to introduce a 4 week old to the world! As a side tangent, I recently read an article on Heidi Klum after she had her last baby. She was talking about all of the women who constantly come up to her asking "Wow, will I look like you after I have MY baby?". She responded "Well, let's be realistic...how did you look before?" Isn't that so true? Let's stop putting unrealistic pressure on ourselves and focus on what is best and what is healthy!
it's sad to say that there are so many women like this out there. personal, societal and spousal pressures can all contribute to it. What she obviously doesn't realize is that the damage that she could have possibly done to her own body is more significant than a few extra pounds! I gained about 65 lbs with my pregnancy - and another 38 over the next 2 years while nursing. Yes, I exercised, yes i watched what I ate, but that is my body - that is my genes. Look at your mom - especially when you were little - I have learned thru many of my mommy friends that this is what to expect.
Of course there are things that you CAN do to lose the baby weight ( look at me, i've lost over 65 lbs in 1 year) - but to start to early is just plain selfish and dangerous. Especially if you are nursing, working out can diminish your milk supply!!
As for your original question - I'm happier with my body than I was after quin was born. I'm heavier than I was prepreggo - but that is ok - i'm working on that. The only thing that I still have an internal issue with is the mommy belly - ask any mom and they'll know exactly what it is - it's the area right below your belly button.... mine is shiny with mommy badges, aka stretch marks, and jiggly... like santa claus jiggly... i can't stand it... but i know it is part of who i am and a reminder of what my body did. Besides, belly shirts are so 90's lol
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